Breakups are hard. There are thousands of songs about how much love can suck.
My ex and I broke up about a week ago. We met at the musical theater intensive I was involved in over the summer and he was my first real relationship. Long distance relationships are hard, and it was time for ours to come to an end. I look forward to meeting someone new who will treat me right.
Easier said than done, right? Breakups are hard for both parties, and this transitory stage has to be handled in a healthy way. My breakup sophomore absolutely destroyed me, but channeling your grief into taking care of yourself will help you move onto a new chapter in your life. I hope that my tips can give you some solace. Know that if you need someone to talk I’m always here for my readers.
Know about the five stages of grief? They are anger, bargaining, depression, denial and acceptance, and can happen for varying periods of time and in different orders. In breakups you’ll be dealing with these stages, and these pampering tips will help you deal with them in a more positive way.
Night: I feel like most breakups are initiated at night, so I’ll start with that. Break out the Ben n’ Jerry’s honey. Have some dark chocolate. Put on some Netflix. Spend time crying your heart out.
Morning: Wash your face with cold water to wake you up and put some ice cubes in a towel or a cold washcloth on your eyes to decrease puffiness.
Day: Make sure to keep all of the blessings in your life in mind as you go throughout the day. You don’t deserve to feel down. Move past your grief each day.
Morning: Being pissed isn’t a good way to start the day. Don’t carry anger with you! Take time to go through your routine and put on a perfume or oil that has a soothing scent. A gentle, nice smelling cleanser will also start off your day right. After putting on your makeup, spritz on a cooling spray like Mario Badescu’s to relax you.
Day: If your ex texts you or something reminds you of him that pisses you off, take a break. Go outside and get some fresh air, and get ready to release all of that pent up energy when you get home. If you keep that spray in your purse it’ll be a nice pick me up throughout the day.
Night: If you don’t get anger out it’ll consume you. Yell in a pillow, write a mean letter and destroy it, or call a friend. Then light some candles and draw up a warm bath. Lavender or rosebuds are especially relaxing at night. Sink in and release thoughts of anger. Spend time lotioning afterward as a kind of gentle massage.
Bargaining AND Denial:
Morning: Don’t keep wishing that you had him back. He ain’t good enough for ya. Know that a new day has new opportunities for meeting amazing new people and becoming a better person yourself.
Day: Keep your positive outlook. Don’t compose texts to him or plan ways to get him back. Focus your energies at the task at hand.
Night: Do NOT text him. Don’t. PLEASE, DON’T. You will regret it and might feel embarrassed or ashamed after the fact. Tell a friend everything. Get all of it out. Put on a face mask and watch a movie or read a good book to distract you from playing out scenarios in your head.
Post Breakup Makeup:
Many people choose to change their appearance after a breakup, but don’t do anything drastic. What seems like a good idea to the post-breakup brain may not seem great later. I’ll give you some tips to make you look like a hot-mama who’s ready to move on with your life and looks ready to play the field. You’ll be so hot no one will believe you’ve just gotten through a breakup!
Make sure you alleviate any puffiness with cool water or ice cubes before you even think about touching a makeup brush. If you have time, put on a cooling mask to treat yo’self. Take a heavy duty concealer and cover up any dark circles from crying and any redness. Then, take a moisturizing base so your skin gets some love and you look like you have a flawless complexion. Next, get your favorite natural blush and with a fluffy brush, sweep it across your cheeks and a bit on your forehead to add healthy color and dimension.
Put on a moisturizing balm in thick layers for night time nourishment, and if you want a bold pick me up try a red lip. If not, go for a tinted balm like the Tarte Lipsurgence line. Going bold is great to show confidence, but if you want to rock a subtle look tints are a great way to look put together.
Make sure you get a good primer or base so your look stays nice for the rest of the day even if you cry. Use a light colored shadow like Barely Branded for tons of different looks from glam to subtle. If you want to go for a smokey eye you can try it with darker shadows, thick lashes and tightline for a Kate Hudson-esque look. For a subtler look just use a light shadow across the lid and wear thick mascara to open up your eyes and make you look happier.
I hope this tutorial helps you learn how to treat yourself well and helped you feel a bit better about your breakup.
The Fashion Mentorby